First we thought we would join some of our other friends and go to the beach. We soon realized, however, that this plan was very complicated because transporting ten people to the beach in one car - rather, without a car - was going to be very difficult. So instead, we thought about going into the city to either Central Park or Battery Park. It wasn't the ocean we were looking for; it was an open, sunny space for tanning ;)
By 10.30 we had decided on Sheep's Meadow in Central Park. But just the two of us wouldn't be very fun... so, we called up two of our other friends to join us! And then the best revelation of all: the idea to have a PICNIC! Go ahead, call it old fashioned, but we couldn't wait to spread a blanket and down some sandwiches.
Around 11, we began writing out a shopping list for picnic food: sandwich stuff, chips, watermelon, etc. Plus, of course, what picnic would be complete without some bubbles and a Frisbee? so we added those to our list, too. In just two, short hours, we were all set for the perfect day.
A perfect day in Sheep's Meadow
Laying out the blanket
I made all these sandwiches!
Lounging in the sun
Frisbee (and my sandals)
Cute people with a heart balloon
L O V E
Ever-essential watermelon - a slice of happiness
As we were running back to Grand Central to catch the last off-peak train of the afternoon, this random man asked us "Are you going to Grand Central?" "Yes..." we replied warily. "Could you walk an old lady to her train?" he asked. And being kind, young kids we said, "Sure."
Purple offered out her arm and immediately the old lady gripped it for dear life. In no time, we figured out that this woman was walking about a mile a day and at this rate, we were going to miss our train, which was just two blocks (five minutes) away.
We tried explaining our predicament to the old lady, but all she said was, "Why can't you take the next train?" We wanted to scream, "Because it's three frikkin' dollars more!!!" But we held it together.
This lady not only had trouble walking, but she was nearly blind and deaf, too. We had to warn her about every infinitesimal crack in the sidewalk. Crossing the street was life-threatening, too. We were only halfway across Madison Ave when the light changed back to red - and there we were, in the middle of the road, moving oh-so-slowly.
When we were almost (finally!) at Grand Central, we asked where she needed to go in the terminal, and she said, "Well, actually, I'm not going to Grand Central. Where I'm really trying to get to is Lexington Avenue."
GOD ALMIGHTY, SMITE ME NOW! This lady had been no brand of nice to us, made a sloth look like Usain Bolt, and now she wanted us to walk her even further??!!?! Lexington Ave was another two blocks from where we were and our train was departing in one minute.
Fuck.
In a last attempt to help the woman, I ran ahead to Grand Central to find a policeman (they're always around there) to see if someone else could walk with her. I found a woman and hastily explained that "my friend and I have this old lady - we don't know who she is - and we have to catch a train NOW... but she needs to go to Lexington. And we can't walk her... they're right over there. Could you help her (read: help us!!!!) please?"
I later realized that I don't think I mentioned how slowly the lady walked. Anyway, the policewoman kindly took her off our hands (literally) and we sprinted down to the train...
...only to see it chugging slowly away from the platform.
After buying some chocolate-hazelnut gelato (yum!) and venting/trying to figure out what just happened, we trudged to the next scheduled train, which would now cost us three more dollars (peak fare). Once on board, we wondered if the conductor would let the fee slide if we explained our nonsensical story to him... and he did!
Thank you, God.
Lesson learned: do not help old ladies
xxo, S
note: I am not very religious in the slightest. The two mentions of God were mere exclamations of frustration and joy
note: it should have taken us five minutes to get to GCT from where we met the old lady. Instead, it took us fifteen minutes.
note: not all old ladies are slow and spiteful. However, the attitude of this particular woman did not leave us with anything but anger towards her.
question: how does this woman get about her daily life?
No comments:
Post a Comment